So to start, Beth has completed all of her treatments. No more chemo. Bad boobs out. "Good" boobs in. Hysterectomy complete.
Recovery from all the surgeries is over, but recovery from "it all" is far from over. What takes the most adjustment is how this process alters your whole body and being.
Beth is back to work, however she sometimes needs to leave early. Work (in addition to everyday life) takes a lot out of her. I can tell when she has been pushing herself too much. Exhaustion is her constant companion (I believe now it always will be).
On July 21st, Beth celebrated her 35th birthday. Now, I am not a big birthday person. I don't really need a big party or care about celebrating. Beth enjoys her birthday. She likes having her friends and family together. She likes having good food and definitely cake. It has meaning to her, especially now. I have never understood the big deal, but now I do. Birthdays are a reason to commemorate being alive for another year. That's a big deal when you thought you might not be alive for the next one. I've thought of my own mortality numerous times, but I cannot imagine how it feels to have your first thought from an ailment be, "what if it's back!"
Not everything is doom and gloom. We have been enjoying the summer. We are eating better. Both of us have joined a gym. Beth's hair is back and awesome. On August 11th, 2015 it will have been one year from diagnosis. Which apparently is the date doctors start the counting for being free of cancer (this is backwards logic to me). So on that day, Beth will have been cancer free for one year!
Recovery from all the surgeries is over, but recovery from "it all" is far from over. What takes the most adjustment is how this process alters your whole body and being.
- Her memory has went from 'elephant' to more on my level (I forget to turn into the grocery store parking lot 45 seconds after Beth tells me we need to stop, but mainly because I space out).
- As a 35 year old woman, she has been forced to enter menopause. She constantly has hot flashes. Instead of taking all the covers in bed, she shoves them onto me.
- Beth has turned to a semi-hypochondriac. Understandably so, any pain she has sends off alarms in her head. I've lost count of how many times she's asked me, "Do you think I should call the doctor?"
- She feels weak and out of shape, because doctors have been telling her off and on for almost a year not to lift anything and to limit exertion.
- I sometimes have to point out that one of her boobs has fallen out of a low cut shirt, because she can't feel it. Just kidding, but she has asked me to keep an eye out. She also lets anyone who's curious feel them. So, just ask.
Beth is back to work, however she sometimes needs to leave early. Work (in addition to everyday life) takes a lot out of her. I can tell when she has been pushing herself too much. Exhaustion is her constant companion (I believe now it always will be).
On July 21st, Beth celebrated her 35th birthday. Now, I am not a big birthday person. I don't really need a big party or care about celebrating. Beth enjoys her birthday. She likes having her friends and family together. She likes having good food and definitely cake. It has meaning to her, especially now. I have never understood the big deal, but now I do. Birthdays are a reason to commemorate being alive for another year. That's a big deal when you thought you might not be alive for the next one. I've thought of my own mortality numerous times, but I cannot imagine how it feels to have your first thought from an ailment be, "what if it's back!"
Not everything is doom and gloom. We have been enjoying the summer. We are eating better. Both of us have joined a gym. Beth's hair is back and awesome. On August 11th, 2015 it will have been one year from diagnosis. Which apparently is the date doctors start the counting for being free of cancer (this is backwards logic to me). So on that day, Beth will have been cancer free for one year!
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